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Time unfortunately is against me, so I’ll have to be brief.

I have spent way too much time on unnecessary tasks like being online.  I’ve found that it’s difficult for me to abide by my own rules.

And the reason is obvious:  I’ve got some subtle aversions towards following my own rules.  I’ve discovered that I have a tremendous amount of ‘junk’ in my life, with nearly everything.  It was a bit overwhelming to see exactly how many of my actions are unconsciously based on moving away from negativity.  On the positive side, I’ve been releasing some issues with some success.  They are uncomfortable but I find that I am making a LOT more progress than in the past.

One of my goals is to feel comfortable speaking Korean, and I have a lot to clear.  I noticed I unconsciously tense up and I fumble with words.  I know precisely what to say, yet I have an ‘automatic’ stuttering reaction.  So, feeling comfortable speaking in Korean is high on my list of goals.  It’s funny because I don’t have this reaction when I speak Chinese even though I never grew up with Chinese.

I’m also using the Release Technique so that I would have $100 show up just by releasing on all the emotions that get in the way of having it.  I am skeptical of whether this really works but I am willing to put it to the test.  I’ve heard some real stories of people who set such an intention and got their $100 just by completely releasing on it.  I’m curious to see how it turns out.  And even if it doesn’t work, clearing money issues really does allow one to have greater clarity when it comes to money making decisions.  I suspect clearing on money issues may require a lot of patience on my part.

As mentioned before, I am fully committed towards ‘going free’, so I will not let my emotions ruin my life.  It is SO tempting to just turn a blind eye to my subtle issues, but if people are willing to work 8 hours a day for someone else, I’m willing to put in the same amount of time releasing on all the subconscious junk I’ve been hanging on to.  I have a lot of time on my hands as I am not working, so I can afford to spend the time in this way.  And fortunately, I’ve made progress thus far, so I continue to take it even further.  I am determined to get free!

Quick summary:

1)  I wrote out a list of rules for myself about what I can/cannot do for these 30 days.
2)  I am keeping track of the activities I do, as well as the time I spend on them using a stop watch (particularly like on my computer).
3)  I compiled a list of things that I would like to have, and a list of things that I would not like to have into a notebook.  This list will continue to grow daily.
4)  I decided to devote 4 hours a day clearing negativity.  Finding time throughout the day for this is not that difficult.
5)  I chose to use the Release Technique as my primarily method of clearing negative emotions.  While EFT and other methods work quite well for me, I am intrigued by an updated releasing approach that I stumbled upon today.  I know it will quickly help me resolve issues.  In many ways, the process is similar to a NLP/NS pattern that I use, but I see something amazing in the process beyond what I have been aware of up until now.

According to The Release Technique, and The Sedona Method, releasing involves the following six steps:

Step 1: You must want Freedom more than the World

Step 2: Decide you can do the Method and be imperturbable

Step 3: See all your feelings culminate in the want for approval, control, and security

Step 4: Make releasing constant

Step 5: If you are stuck, let go of wanting to control the stuckness

Step 6: Each time you release you are happier and lighter

While I have known this for quite sometime, I did not realise the significance of step 1 and 2.  Quite often, I would use EFT to clear negativity, but it would be done out of a wanting of control, approval or security (or all of them combined).  In other words, I wasn’t committed to being free!  Lester Levenson refers to this state as hootlessness where literally one does not give a hoot about the issue.  I will apply all this towards all my goals and see how things turn out by the end of the 30 days.  It will be an interesting challenge.

If there’s any one important lesson I’ve learned lately, it’s this:  GET ANGRY!  And I don’t mean at other people.  Get angry at your laziness, complacency and mediocrity!  It’s taking away your life!

Several days ago, I bought into the idea that I was a victim.  It took me a while to see that I had trapped myself even though I consciously knew what I was doing.  I was oscillating between empowerment and victimhood.  And after having stepped into such a reality for quite some time, I got literally fed up with all the BS I’ve been telling myself.

From this day forth, I intend to do WHATEVER it takes to completely change my life.  I’ve got a whole list of emotional issues that are unresolved, but I refuse to let myself be controlled by them.  The knowledge and skills I possess to help people is more than enough for me to change, so it’s time that I make more changes with my life!

I’ve helped people rapidly overcome all sorts of issues, such as phobias, trauma, addictions, food cravings, guilt, anxiety, and a whole host of other issues that I do not recall.  And there wasn’t a time when I wasn’t able to help anyone except when people were unwilling to change.  I am sharing this to remind myself of what I have done.  My past successes really do keep me back on track.  And I just noticed that I wasn’t willing to change several areas of my life, and so I ask myself:

What have I been unwilling to change in my life?  What is more important?  Mediocrity or Transformation?

I chose to create a 30 day challenge to get the most amount of change I possibly can within these 30 days without needing to buy any book or product, since I already have enough tools.   Here is my tentative plan:

1)  Create a list of things I DO NOT want in my life – I will do this by constantly being aware of and jotting down all the emotions I experience throughout my day.  The key is to bring them out into the light.  I am NOT going to let any stone be left unturned!  This will be one very interesting exercise as it will reveal to me how my behaviors have been programmed or conditioned to be a certain way.

2)  Create the opposite of that ‘DO NOT’ want list (i.e. a list of desired outcomes)

3)  Clear the DO NOT wants (as well as their associations)- Using a whole variety of tools (EFT, NLP, RT, and whatever else I have in my ‘toolbox’ of skills)

4)  Empower my list of desired outcomes – Using the same tools mentioned above

The above plan will likely be revised as I find more efficient ways to go about getting the changes I desire.

It may not be fun, but I am fed up with mediocrity!!  I REFUSE to let myself be controlled by my emotions!  My life is MUCH too important for me to simply settle for less than I am truly worth.

My goal is transformation!

I just had a conversation with someone, and noticed how much subconscious junk was coming out through my words.  It was embarrassing, but I know that this experience was very important for me, as it shed light on more areas of my life that haven’t been settled.  Unlike the past where I used to beat myself up whenever I thought I did something foolish, I am able to stare it in the face and see it for what it is.  This, to me, is significant!    Something is most definitely different.

I’m waking up early on a consistent basis.  I am actually running 2 miles a day and I ENJOY IT!  This was unthinkable a month ago, and my life seems to be all the more interesting.  I attribute all this to my supportive friends here in Korea as well as a particular product that I am putting to the test.  There is absolutely no doubt in my mind that something is different with my life!

I wonder what other positive changes I will notice by the end of this week?

Gotta love the self-suggestion! =)

I made a huge realisation about what I am to do with the rest of my life.  It also led me to change the direction of my blog.  The original purpose of this blog was to teach people how to market online.  I’ve learned tons over the past 6 months, and it’s something I enjoy doing.  I do plan to continue posting articles on online marketing, but this blog will focus on personal development as it is something that I have always been interested in.

The other day, I knew that I had to give up my network marketing business.  It’s not because of resistant friends or family (my dad, in particular, was completely against it thinking I was wasting my money), rather I came to a realisation that I was swimming upstream.  It’s almost like a horse trying to be a cow.  It just doesn’t work.  Once I let it go, a tremendous peace came upon me.

Now, I have no intention of going back to a job, which in my mind is far riskier than running a business.  Jobs simply do not pay enough and I have chosen to no longer rely on a boss to determine how much I’m worth.  At the moment, I have LITERALLY no idea what I am going to do, but I am at peace right now.  For the past few weeks I’ve been stressed out, but now it’s like the struggle is now over.  It’s like I don’t have to do anything.  Somehow, I know that I am being taken care of.

That’s not to say I will intentionally do nothing, but I suspect I will know exactly what to do to generate income without relying on a job.  I don’t have much money left, but oddly enough it really doesn’t bother me at all.  Somehow I know that I’ll be fine.